‘I cried in an audition last week. Well, I clenched’: Hugh Skinner on musicals, mischief and the Little Mermaid

Describe your perfect hour...
It’s, like, the end of a scuba-diving session, and as we surface we all get some incredibly good news, and are joined by a gay rugby team for seafood, chips with garlic mayonnaise, and drinks.

If you could live in any era, which would it be?
I’d go to biblical times and wow them with songs from Andrew Lloyd Webber’s religious musicals – I’m particularly fond of Jesus Christ Superstar – so they thought I was some sort of psychic pop star.

What is your favourite time of day?
The honest – and disgusting – answer is the first cigarette of the day, after breakfast. I am going to quit – it’s so expensive – and replace it with mung beans or something. I tried the Alan Carr Easy Way To Stop Smoking book, but it tells you to keep smoking as you read it, so I drew out finishing it for as long as possible and then never stopped. There’s this new thing in France where they shine a laser in your ear to help you stop smoking. I might try that.

If you could spend an hour with anyone famous, who would you choose?
I’d love to meet Andy Kaufman [the American entertainer], who I got into after watching Jim Carrey play him in Man on the Moon.

When was the last time you cried?
I cried in an audition last week. Well, I clenched, which usually does the trick. It wasn’t because the audition had gone badly – it was part of the scene.

Which time of your life do you daydream about the most?
I don’t daydream that much, but I do think about sitting in the art room doing my A-levels, making stuff with plaster, having really earnest chats about Radiohead, feeling like adults before we had to be them. I think I’ve nailed the bumbling oaf quite well. Playing an action frontman might be a bit of a stretch.

When was the last time you stole something? 
I once stole a copy of The Observer after a bad review – so I felt like it was justified. I stole a pair of socks from The Windsors. The costume designer always gave us brilliantly posh socks, and there was a red pair with pheasants on…

When was the last time you checked social media?
Last night. My friend Jordan Luke Gage – who is a great theatre actor – has written all the songs, lyrics and the script for this amazing show called Red Cliff. I’m in awe of writers, being so unproductive myself. I’d love to have a go at writing something. In the back of my head I always thought I’d be in a boy band – that hasn’t happened either.

What do you never have enough time for?
I’m actually not working at the moment, so if anything I have got too much time on my hands. I bought a pigs’ trough the other day to put some plants in – they are cheaper than planters from the garden centre – and had to drill holes in the bottom, but I didn’t hoover afterwards. Now I’ve got flecks of iron in my feet. I feel like Ariel from The Little Mermaid when she first gets legs.

If you make it to your 100th birthday, what would be the reason?
I supposed I’d have to be cryogenically frozen, then thawed out in 59 years to blow out the candles.

Twenty Twenty Six is now on BBC Two and iPlayer

Styling by Catherine Hayward; blue suit, shirt, tie and sunglasses all by Dunhill. Grooming by Charley McEwen