‘The film My Father’s Shadow had me in tears’

Actor Arinzè Kene was born in Lagos in 1987 and moved to London aged four. He earned an Olivier nomination in 2022 for his portrayal of Bob Marley in Get Up, Stand Up!, and he has had roles in Eastenders and last year’s film Harvest. He also writes for the stage; his play Misty was a West End hit in 2018. Kene plays a US marine searching for meaning in Bengal Tiger at the Baghdad Zoo, at the Young Vic from 2 December to until 31 January, and will appear in An Ark, a new mixed reality production at The Shed in New York from 9 January to 1 March.

Pasero, London N15

My relationship with caffeine is crazy: I’m constantly on and off it. I started again in August and I’m loving it. The thing I really missed was going to cafés and the conversations you have with regulars. My favourite is Pasero on West Green Road. Good coffee, good music, and it’s kid-friendly. I can also write from there: the plugs for laptops are in the right places and the internet works. On my deathbed, I’ll be like, “Oh, I’m going to miss the cafés.” I hope they have some in my next life.

Brazilian jiu-jitsu

I started doing Muay Thai about 10 years ago, and then I ended up falling in love with Brazilian jiu-jitsu and competing. I’m more suited to jiu-jitsu because it’s like a game of chess and I like to think a lot. Also it’s a bit of an equaliser: often you’ll be sparring with somebody half your size but they’re way better than you. I train at Fightzone in Bethnal Green, a great martial arts gym. I’m a hobbyist but I like to spar with the pros, even though they smash me. But every now and then you surprise them.

Is It Normal? The Pregnancy Podcast with Jessie Ware

I’ve just become a dad for the first time. In the months [before the birth], you realise you know absolutely nothing about babies. Jessie Ware, the amazing musician, has a podcast in which she talks to healthcare professionals, mothers and authors. It’s really useful information that you can use or throw out, because not every suggestion works for everyone. It’s a reminder that you’re not the first person who’s done this, and if the Moses basket doesn’t arrive on time, you’ll be OK.

Intimate Apparel

I saw this Lynn Nottage play years ago and remember enjoying it, but I’d forgotten what it was about. Then I saw Lynette Linton’s brilliant production at the Donmar [in London]. It’s about a lonely seamstress in New York who is writing love letters to a mysterious man, and you sort of know that she’s going to be eaten alive by this guy, but you don’t judge her for giving it a chance. It’s a heartbreaking story but a beautiful telling – and a reminder of why I love theatre so much.

D’Angelo

D’Angelo’s passing last month really took me by surprise. He’s somebody I’ve listened to since I was 11 or 12. His first two albums are incredible, and Really Love from his 2014 album Black Messiah is one of the most beautiful songs I’ve ever heard. Listening back now, it feels like walking into my old bedroom from 20 years ago and looking at my single bed, my little CD player, my bedsheets with the racing car on them. I’m just so glad that my youth had D‘Angelo in it, and that he was the soundtrack to all those moments.

My Father’s Shadow

I saw this at the London film festival last month and I loved it. It’s a really beautiful film [released in the UK on 6 February] about a Nigerian dad, played by Sope Dirisu, and his sons played by two wonderful young first-timers. It takes place during a politically charged time in Nigeria, and it made me think of home, and of my dad’s passing and funeral, and how we handle death. It had me in tears at the end. I thought it might be because I’m Nigerian, but there was a southeast Asian woman beside me and she was completely broken too.

Photographs by Getty Images, WireImage/Getty Images, Paul Bergen/Redferns, Helen Murray