Si King: ‘We knocked 50 Shades of Grey off the top of the charts’

Photograph by Amelia Troubridge

Dave and I were just ordinary blokes in extraordinary circumstances. [Dave Myers was the other half of the Hairy Bikers; he died in 2024.] Fundamentally, we were two daft mates who loved food, loved riding motorcycles, loved chatting to people and loved travel. As soon as we hit the road with a bike, my god, we did 650,000 miles through our career. That’s a remarkable statistic.

The most successful Hairy Bikers book was Hairy Dieters. Which was a bit of a U-turn, because at the time we were known for a big knob of butter. A mate of ours said, “Listen, guys, you need to lose some weight, because I don’t think you’re going to reach 50.” So Dave and I were like, “OK,” and we did a diet book. And it knocked 50 Shades of Grey off the top slot. Dave said: “Well, Kingy, it’s plain to see the way to the nation’s heart is definitely through its stomach, not its genitalia.”

My dad was at sea for years. And he would come back from Shanghai and Singapore and Bangkok and say, “Right, Stella, this is what I’ve had.” So my mam would recreate that in the North Durham coalfields in the 1950s to the slight annoyance of the local community, who could often be heard saying, “What the bloody hell’s that stink coming out your kitchen there, Stella? Has Gray brought some of that foreign muck back?”

My father died when I was eight. And we grieved Dad’s loss around the stove. We were in the shit, so what we did was we comfort ate. I was a stone for every age. At eight, I was eight stone. At nine, I was nine stone. At 10, I was 10 stone. At 11, I was 11 stone. I’ve struggled with my weight ever since.

Cheffing is 90% good shopping. And there’s only 10% you should bring to that produce. I’ve lived my life by that.

We’ve got some of the best seafood in the world, particularly in the north-east. I was brought up on Lindisfarne oysters, on great langoustines, on fantastic turbot, cod, eel and skate, haddock. And pollock – which is a complete waste of time in my view. Yes, it’s sustainable, but it doesn’t taste of anything. So you can keep that.

I only ever wanted one tattoo. We pulled up at a set of traffic lights in Patagonia and we heard Led Zeppelin’s Physical Graffiti blasting out of a shop window, which happened to be a tattooist. I went in and said, in terribly poor Spanish, “Could I have a tattoo of Che Guevara please?” And Dave goes, “Well, there’s no show without Punch.” So he got one as well. There was the two of us, sitting in this tattooist in the middle of nowhere, getting drunk, and we had a proper party for three and a half hours. It was fantastic.

Dave and I, we were the Hairy Bikers, and now that’s no longer the case. The hardest question anybody’s ever asked me is, “What is it you want to do, Si?” My answer is, “I don’t know.” But I want to do more books. I want to do more programmes. I want to do more travel. I want to shine a light on cultures that aren’t our own. And if Anthony Bourdain can guide me, I’d be very grateful!

Food

If it was my final meal, I’d have the worst sliced bread I could find, white, I’d have the best bacon I could find, and I’d have a bacon sandwich with a hot, sweet cup of tea. And then they could do with me what they like.

Drink

I like a whiskey, Irish whiskey: my favourite is 25-year-old Redbreast. I drink it in the evening in front of my fire when I get home.

Place to eat

There’s a restaurant in Newcastle called Cantina, which is vegetarian. My god, that’s good. The boys there are brilliant. One of them happens to be my son, but that doesn’t matter. Because if it was shit, I’d tell them, but it really isn’t shit.

Dish to make

It’s a bit of a comfort one: flat rib broth. Basically it’s a piece of flat rib, full of collagen and goodness. And you boil it with carrots, onion, celery, pearl barley, red lentil, split peas, both yellow and green. Then you cook that in beef or chicken stock, and finish it with lots and lots of parsley. Man, it’s good.

The Best of the Hairy Bikers (Seven Dials, £25) is out now. Buy it for £22.50 at observershop.co.uk

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